Edger - Audio Book

Comedy, Action/Adventure

This post is part of a virtual book tour organized by Goddess Fish Promotions. 

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Meet Edger (Ed-jer), a twenty-six-year-old gadget retail dork destined to become the world’s first superhero! His superpower: the ability to channel the Collective Unconscious, a psychic network connecting the living and the dead. In his arsenal are the skills of Bruce Lee, the strength of Samson, the wisdom of the ages...and the dancing chops of Michael Jackson—including that one twisty foot move, crotch grab, and fedora tilt. But there's a catch... Like every psychic super power to get administered through a hypodermic needle, this one comes with a prick. Someone seems to have misplaced the booster necessary for stabilizing his superpower. Without it, Edger has three days before his brain turns to pudding. Join our Dork of Destiny as he overcomes the world’s greatest butt, two rival Cluck-n-Pray gangs, an evil cow, a Green Bay Defensive Tackle, rifle-toting assassins—and a pair of stoners who inadvertently create the world’s first supervillain after a wild night on Twitter!

My review...

A funny and entertaining story. As usual, David Beem has written as quirky a story as ever. I’m saying “as ever” because I happened to read Books 2 & 3 before Book 1. Maybe I’m as quirky as David Beem. Oops, that didn’t come out right, did it? But if you read or listen to these Edger books, you’ll see what I mean.

This is a story full of superheroes, nerds, plenty of weird characters. Edger is kind of a wild and crazy guy. More like a super smart wild and crazy guy. I couldn’t even believe I’m reading such a crazy story and yet the next pages are about Edger being worried about his Grandma. See? Full of everything. But amongst all of the nuttiness there is a story here. A fun one.

This whole book is as odd as you can imagine. I shouldn’t have used just “funny” before as a description. More like eccentric, zany, nutsy. Definitely worth reading.

But let me tell you something even more fun if that’s possible. David Beem’s oddball character comes to life with the narrator in this audio version. I have a complete picture of this superhero, nerdy, strange guy and it makes the story even better.    

Anyway you enjoy it, whether reading or listening, you’ll have fun. Give it a look or a listen and laugh out loud. 

read an excerpt...

The water is filling.

We’re spinning.

Blondie is rapturing.

Below us, the nightclub turns like a sparkling dream. Worse, Underwearld is wallpapered in phosphorescent art photos of Caleb in his Calvin Kleins.

“Hey Edger—it’s Caleb!” says Mary, banging her shoulder against the side of our disco ball water torture prison and sloshing water. “Caleb! Caleb!”

I roll my eyes. “Of course you know Caleb. Because the universe just couldn’t let me die without letting me know: Hey—Mary knows Caleb.”

“Edger, Caleb’s H.A.R.D.O.N.”

“Hard-on for you, hard-on for Kate—”

“Oh my God, Edger. Not now, okay? High Risk Agency for Regulating the Defense Of the NFL.”

“What!? That doesn’t even make any sense! It should be H-A-R-D-O—wait, somebody capitalized the freaking O—?! You know, my tax dollars paid someone to capitalize that letter O.”

“Really? Really, Edger? You want to do this now?”

“That’s what they always say too: ‘You wanna do this now.’ But notice they never balance the budget. All I’m saying is, you gotta talk about it sometime.”

“Edger! We. Are about. To die.”

So I’m panting, she’s panting, and Caleb’s down there scanning the room in front of a larger than life phosphorescent photograph of his crotch. Because apparently all paths in life lead there.

“Caleb!” Mary yells.

“Caleb!” I yell.

And so there we are, yelling our butts off, banging our shoulders into the wall, water sloshing over our faces—you know, not panicking.

Then the water level reaches our chins.

 

about David Beem... 

 David Beem loves superhero movies, taekwondo, and flossing. He lives in Djibouti with his family and crippling self-doubt. To help actualize David’s inner confidence, visit his website and buy all the stuff: www.davidbeem.com

The audiobook is coming soon on Amazon. Check out David's Edger books now

Amazon author page: https://www.amazon.com/David-Beem/e/B005M4NEYI/

 

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